I have a hard time saying goodbye to people. I know I’ve written about this before, I probably write about this a lot, because people are always leaving, or I’m leaving. As I find myself leaving for the summer, only to leave again to grad school, goodbyes are on my mind.  In my ideal world I would just be near everyone I like all the time. No one would have to leave. Now, I know this isn’t really ideal, it just sounds great. In reality, it would be impossible to stay close with every single person you’ve met. I was reading in Doug’s blog http://www.schertzer.org, he just left for Malawi. He was talking about how God often brings people into our lives for only a short time and how we should learn, share and be present with these people for the short time they are in our lives. While most of the time, this is hardly what really happens. Those were good words to read.  

As much as I would like God to keep all my family and friends near me all the time, it’s just not the way he has it planned.  Every time I leave a place, I wonder if I’ll ever see these people again. Leaving Rainbow Glacier Camp, leaving Malawi, every time, I pray the I would be able to see these people again, to see this place again, that he would bring me back.  It was so incredibly hard to leave the kids at camp and the kids in Malawi, knowing I had worked so hard to establish a trusting relationship with them, and these relationships had so much potential. I had invested my time and my heart into their lives just as they had done with me, and to have that just taken away, was heartbreaking.  I wanted to walk with them, to watch them grow into the people they were created to be, I wanted to share in the joys and their sorrows, and I did, but only for a short time. There is much to be said for that short time. We walked together for a brief moment in time and I am a better person because of that time. Even knowing this, it doesn’t make it any easier to leave. But, it does give me perspective enough to know that I am blessed to be around the people I care about even for a short time and to try and be present in those moments. I am feeling incredibly blessed to be able to go back to Malawi and to see the kids I just love so much.  Although, I’ll be in a different village with different kids than before, I know I’ll start new relationships and walk with new kids in their joys and sorrows for another brief moment in time and I will learn so much from them. And again, I will pray for the opportunity come back to that place and see them again. 

 I absolutely love this Late Tuesday song. It’s one of those songs that you listen to in replacement of a therapist.  It’s musical therapy. This song has helped me as friends have come and gone and I have come and gone… 

Time flies when you’re having fun
And it’s flown too quickly for me
For my time has arrived
The day has come, the day I must leave
Where I’ll go I cannot barely know
All I see is the road at my feet I must go, I must leave this place
I have somewhere to go
I have a new road to follow
I must go, and though I wish I could stay
There is something beyond what I see
I must go

And though I feel like I’m losing myself as I fear leaving all this behind me
I will not, I will not lose my faith as I go
For my fears will be vanished in time
And I know that I will be fine

I must go, I must leave this place
I have somewhere to go
I have a new road to follow
I must go, and though I wish I could stay
There is something beyond what I see
I must go

And I will not forget you, I could not forget you
Even though I cannot be by your side
But life’s course has brought us to this place, tomorrow we must embrace
And seek joy in this bittersweet goodbye